Why?

Why do people have less patience with their loved one? With strangers, their tolerance level is a lot higher than with someone they are closed to. People get impatient when their loved ones ask mundane questions, or make plain remarks about something. So what if it's a question already answered a while ago? So what if it's a common sense remark? Just because you do not tend to remember certain things you heard doesn't mean that we ARE supposed to remember everything you said.
Just because you have a bad day or a tiring day does not mean that you have the right to release your anger on anything trivial. Anger towers above all other, when anger flares up, not even love or compassion can overcome it. At moment like this, sometimes the other side may wonder what's the point of being there, or even trying to make conversation if one gets vicious response. Remember, unless you are perfect, accept others flaws, just as others accept yours! Doesn't it make you want to rethink about life? You are definitely right, life is as cruel as it is, you do not need these kind of craps as well! Talk about uptightness! Not forgetting that intelligence came with a price as well ... it's impatience!!! Thank goodness for blog, it takes everything. Maybe this is what those people need ... GET A BLOG!! THEN YOU CAN CRAP AS MUCH AS YOU WANT! And the best thing is, you cannot hurt its feeling ... it's emotionless! That's what you need right there ...

One minute of shock

Well, it is finally out! I couldn't keep it any longer in me. The burden was too heavy for me to bear. I spilled it out to him at last. At first he took it easy, maybe it had not hit him yet of the truth. Eventually, as reality set in, he became more and more stunned.
'How long did you know?' he spoke softly, so hush that I had to stop sobbing to comprehend him.
'A while ago,' I answered, not daring to breathe in case it broke the spell, releasing the real emotion hidden.
'I am who I am, I cannot change it, nor can I ignore it,' I added quietly. 'They need me and my enemies definitely cannot know about you. You are my pillar of strength, my universe and yet will be my downfall against evil. I wish I can disregard them, but they have no control of any situation, their only mistake was to be born among their enemies, who are getting stronger as we speak.'
'So this is it then?' he asked.
'This is it, my love, now I understand why I am different. This is my fate, just as it was fate that unite us. Maybe when all the chaos is over, maybe then fate will bring us together again ....' I stopped, as he became inconsolable the more she went on.
'Just go ... leave me alone.' he whispered.
I left, my heart shattered into many pieces as the distance separating us increased. This one minute had changed my life forever.
That was the last time I saw him. I never knew what had became of him. I visited once, during time of lapse, thinking that I could see him discreetly, but he no longer lived there anymore and I lost hope of ever finding him after many attempts. In moment like this, even my difference could not help me. I gave light to the lifeless, in return, I lost mine. We won eventually, but with victory meant nothing to me. No one to celebrate with, no one to listen to my stories. I became just another brokenhearted being ...
My name is Amelia Soulange and this is my story.

Got time?

One year of searching
And I finally found you
One month of hesitating
And I eventually told you
One week of planning
When I somehow surprised you
One day of restlessness
I was determined to say it
One minute of shock
Left me paralysed
One second of realisation
Of what I did
One decade of regret
I still cannot let go
A lifetime of heartache
I carry with me

The Power of Hogwarts!

Oh the misery we put ourself into just to get the 6th book we have been waiting for so long. AT LAST! The wait is OVER! I cannot believe that I actually went to the store at 11.30pm at night, waited impatiently among other Harry Potters' fans for Harry Potter and the half-blood Prince. Some came all dressed up, oblivious of the surrounding, too caught up in their fantasy world of magic. Mums waiting eagerly as their child/ren kept asking them ... 'Is it here? Is it here yet?' Those noisy bunches of lee .. I mean oats! Around 12.07am (yeah, they prevaricated. 12.01am my fesse!), 900 books were pushed out and there went Harrys' fans! Unimaginable transformation!! Thank goodness they are just plain Muggles, therefore none had proper wands! Can you envisage the catastrophe! Human turning into insects, reptiles, etc ... I finally managed to get one with the aid of a former neighbour I saw while waiting for the grand appearance. And it's not over yet, oh no!! Now it's the queue at the check-out. Of course as anticipated, all of the express check-out started to fill up rapidly. I eventually paid for the culprit and here am I. Now if you pardon me, I may have to let you go so that I can start my 6th year at Hogwarts ...

The Power of Song

Cost of a CD player: $250.00
Cost of your favorite CD: $15.00
Cost of gas to get your CD: $2.00
Cost of electricity to listen to your CD: $10.00
The memory you get from listening to the song few years later: Priceless!

For anything else, there's a J.O.B somewhere that you can do which pays for your other stuffs.

Got Luck?

Life is full of ups and downs, mostly downs. During the down times, it is especially doleful when your loved one is so far away and there's no other person who can offer the kind of solace you get from your significant other. You can only carry these doldrums to a certain point before you finally break down. Life is more bearable when you have someone to share it with, I guess. It's just annoying when someone told you that the downs will make you stronger. How strong do you want to get anyway?!! Probably just an excuse ... got to see life in the brighter side, right?

Got Wish?

So one night, I have came to a decision that I wanted to sky-dive before I get too old. I decided that PA would be the state I would want to do it. It was this one short time that I wished for it and never put any thought to it after that. So I got here a few days before independence day, lazing around watching tv when the news announced that this one place will be offering skydiving activity for $100. I will definitely have to forgo this wish right now. What's so amazing though, is that whenever one wishes for or even thinks of something, just once, is enough for it to come true. But when you keep wishing for something that you really need, or think you need, most of the time it doesn't come true. Oh well, I guess only the divine knows what's important for us. So for those out there, don't wish too hard, you may not have it granted. Got wish?

Could I?

I could wait for you
like Rat hole in your boot
Waiting to be fixed
I could wait for you
But what good will that do
But to leave me pricked

-D.R

Got Words?

Can you really say that you understand adults even when you are one yourself? I remembered when I was young, words came freely out and I don't have to worry about offending anyone because apparently, I realised now, kids can accept a lot of crap from other people better than adults. Now, everything one says has to be guarded and precise because, goodness know why, adults analyze everything ... they way you talk, the words you use, the expression you give, even to the tone of voice ... Well, I got to admit, there are some mentioned above that you really need to express gingerly, but to the extend of dissecting every little bit and pieces of your conversation ... that's kind of farcical isn't it? No wonder adults don't get to cherish the simple things in life. I realise that the older I get the less I talk because most of the time, it's better to keep my mouth motionless. I wonder whether it's a good thing because people tend to forget if they don't exercise their aptitudes often ... oh well, you never know, I may end up ameliorating my writing instead. So ... got words?

Got Way?

Got Weird?

What does it mean when you dreamt of something odd, such as bumping into someone you have never seen before, but were totally gregarious with the person in the dream, or being in a strange location? How about being in one unfamiliar place and return to the same place over and over again a few days later? Does this mean you may want to pay better attention to this kind of dream?

According to coolquiz.com, there are two different interpretations of why we dream, the physiological theory and the psychological theory. "Two underpinning physiological facts go towards supporting this theory of dreams. The first lies in the fact that the first two or so years of ones life, the most formative ones for learning, are also the ones in which the most REM sleep occurs. It follows that during this time of the greatest REM sleep, we experience the greatest number of dreams. The second physiological fact that lends credence to this theory is that our brain waves during REM sleep, as recorded by machines measuring the brain's electrical activity, are almost identical in nature to the brain waves during the hours we spend awake. This is not the case during the other phases of sleep.
Psychological theorists of dreams focus upon our thoughts and emotions, and speculate that dreams deal with immediate concerns in our lives, such as unfinished business from the day, or concerns we are incapable of handling during the course of the day. Dreams can, in fact, teach us things about ourselves that we are unaware of."

Oh well, as long as the unprecedented dreams are beautiful, I do not mind dreaming it repeatedly. Maybe one day when you travel far enough, you may find the place you dreamt of, or even find the person you saw in your dream. Isn't that just enigmatic?

How Do We Know?

We saw it through
Good, Bad, Ugly
We stood strong
But our hearts told us we were wrong
How do we know
When to quit
When to give up
When to throw in the towel
Do we decide with our hearts?
Do we decide with our heads?
How do we know?
How will it all go?
Where will it all go?
How will it end?
As we strive to survive
Know that you will always be
Near and dear to me
And this I want you to know
My love for you will be
More than I'll ever know

-csf

Got Door?

It is true what people say about when a door closes, another one will open. But it is also true that you must feel optimistic when a door closes because being rancorous about the closed door, or rather the reason for it doesn't help much in finding an open door. Thing happens for a reason. Even though it is hard to accept the iniquity, eventually one comes to realise that it wasn't such at all ... more of an opportunity that you dare not venture into for fear of the unknown.

Will this ever end??

Final week ... it seems I'm about to go crazy trying to get everything done and catching up with what I've missed. Haven't been sleeping well lately with all these chaos going on. Boy oh boy ... will I be doubtlessly glad when all this is over after the 20th. ... can't abide the moment where I can just dawdle around not having to worry about exams. Until then, what more can I say except ... enjoy it while you can coz maybe one day, you will miss all this ... and I utterly agree!

There's a tinkling chinkling going on ...

There's a tinkling chinkling going on
Somewhere in the midst of this chaotic world
It's going on everywhere and everyday
All you have to do
Is to be real quiet
And listen as hard as you can
Coz when you hear
this tinkling chinkling
You know everything will be
Alright ...

The Journey of Mr. Cacahouete

Let's just say Mr. Cacahouete is a person of his own kind, trying to survive in this cruel world, making a good future for himself and Mrs... nope, no kid yet but that's ok coz kids are pain in the fesses, if i may say so, not to say that they are famous for their atrocities and they suck you dry, phyically and mentally. So now, everyday in the morning, Mr. Cacahouete sets out to work, saying goodbye to his lovely tiny babblative wife. Looking tan, just as a cacahouete should look like, he arrives at work and startes doing his stuffs. As the day goes by, as more and more bugaboos get solved, Mr. Cacahouete becomes ... how do I say it ... RED! Yes, red it is. Why? No idea. Apparently, it is due to his ire. The more shirty he is, the redder he gets. Been like that for a while now, and that's how he's known as from then on ... RED ... like the red spanish peanut! Lol .. Pretty amazing eh? Becareful Mr. Cacahouete or you'll remain red forever. ; )
Oh well ... just a short piece written for someone who has ... Red's Tales!!!

Perhaps You Think You Never Will Recover

Perhaps you think you never will recover.
Abysses in your heart disturb your pleasure.
Underneath each sunlit ecstasy
Lie shadows of the fortunes of another,
A fate that's both your burden and your treasure.

Taken from:
http://www.poemsforfree.com/philpo.html

Trappe

Why do you ever feel like there are times when nothing seems to go your way? ... when time is going too fast that you can't seem to catch on with it but at the same time it's going too slow that you are impatient for the results? Why this ordeal? Is this really an ordeal or is it just what you make out of it, an illusion that you created? ... I feel so overwhelmed with many things. It seems so hard to please everyone when you know that you have only that much to give. Seriously, don't you feel like telling everyone to *&%# and just do what you want? Yeah ... especially now. Took a card out and this is what I got ...

The Struggle
You feel a sense of conflict. The struggle that seems to be happening outside of you may, in reality, be happenning on the inside. You feel as if you are striving, but you are immobilized at the same time: chaos has resulted from the presence of conflicting ideas. Allow yourself to 'fail', allow yourself to 'lose', and you may find you are actually winning. In losing all, you will gain everything. In this case, you are merely relinquishing that which is obsolete.

Maybe I am analyzing too much. Should just concentrate on my studies now. Others can come later. Too bad if you can't wait. Just because I don't say anything doesn't mean I don't know anything. Just because I don't mention it doesn't mean I don't notice it... peace to the world!

Une signe ailleurs

Is it time to relinquish? I came to do what I was supposed to do and I guess it's time move on. Maybe I am supposed to stop fighting and let it go. Maybe it's not meant to be, heck, maybe it was never meant to be. You can fight for a while, but you can never fight forever. Where is the sign that was supposed to guide me? Do you only get it when you reach the entrance? Did I miss it, or was I too blind to notice it? Perhaps I went to fast, perchance I saw it but repudiate it. Maybe there were more signs along the way, maybe I actually missed all of them. Or maybe they were actually there, except that I got into the wrong entrance. Eventually I'd end up where I started ... right? Save it's a different entrance now. And then what? Shall I wait for a sign? Will someone, somewhere, anyone, anywhere show me? The little voice in me tells me that I should, it doesnt know why, just that I should! You know what ... maybe the little voice is the sign!

Mon Soulagement

Aujourd'hui, la journee ne commencait pas bien. J'avais un peu le cafard. Mais, le monde continuait meme si je voulais arreter et respirer. Je n'avais pas de choix sauf de le suivre. Je suis alle en cours. Je n'ai rien ecoute. La classe suivante ne serais pas mieux non plus, je me sus dit. Alors, le cours a commence, j'ai essaye de suivre ce que le prof disait, mais ce n'etait pas facile, je te dis. Il l'a fini 10 minutes en avance. Je croyais que je pourrais faire mes affaires jusqu'il a dit .. 'Je ne suis pas content du tout de vos resultats. Je crois que vous pouvez faire miex que ca ... ' Je l'ai vu et je me suis sente que mon coeur, il a arrete un instant .... When I got it back, boy was I glad. It wasn't what I wanted but it'd do right now. Been telling myself that I must give thanks ... Isn't it amazing how a little thing can change your temperament in an instant. Maybe I should start letting go and just live simply ... enjoy the sun, appreciate the plants that are coming out soon and decorate the world, smile more often ... coz your possessions will be someone elses' when u die, but what and who you are will be yours forever ... peace to the world, and say NO to seal clubbing! You may not realise it now, but when the animals become extinct, you will too ...